A necessary catch up

I have been SO busy!

First of all, I finished up my last placement a few weeks ago. 100% enjoyed this placement. The nursing staff consisted of two Enrolled nurses and two RN’s one in a management role. I most worked with the EN’s but they did plenty of exciting things and 100% involved me. It was a really great team to be apart of and I’m sad that the time went so quickly!

Then Exams came! One Multi choice question and the other was a short answer exam. Both went good, you never know what the mark will be but I feel I did enough. I studied hard, and i’m sure it will pay off and show in my exam results (still waiting upon).

This weekend just gone, straight after exams I helped move my friend back to Whakatane, and i’m finally going to have some chill time before I start my new job.

My new job is promoting independence for elderly in their homes rather than going into retirement homes. I’m super excited about it and I can’t wait to begin it!


Busy times and bad news.

So a quick run down of how placement has been, I administered my first IMI the other week, that was super exciting and done heaps of wound dressings. The nursing staff are allĀ professional, nice and supportive. I am enjoying myself at placement. But I have so much work to do, my stress levels are so high. I am writing an essay that HAS to be great as my last one was very average, I have competencies that need to be written, and I also need to prepare for my final exams which are in 4 weeks.

So my bad news is basically that my best friend is moving back to her home town. It’s 3 hours away. It doesn’t seem that bad.. but it feels like my heart has been ripped away.

I knew that she was having trouble in our city, but I never knew the extent and I feel responsible by being so busy all the time and i am utterly heart broken. She told me over social media and I just cried and cried. I lay on my floor and cried. My other best friend lives 40 minutes away from me, and I hardly have the money for gas or the physical time, to visit and I am constantly missing her. So I am expecting the worse with this.

In all honesty i feel like nothing to her, She didn’t include me in her thoughts of moving home, I had no idea. I feel so abandoned by my best friend and I am devastated.

I love her in the most un-lesbian way and everything reminds me of her. I have such a good time with her and she’s just relaxed and easy to get along with. I honestly have the best friends in the world but I just don’t want her far away. I already don’t see one best friend enough. I feel so selfish but I already miss her and she hasn’t even left. I can’t stop crying. But I know that even though I really really want her to stay near me, she is really upset living here. So neither of us would be happy in any situation I suppose.

And because I was upset and even angry and selfish. She is now angry at me.

Maybe I just wasn’t the best of friends, I need to let her do her thing but It’s breaking my heart and I can’t stop crying.